fight of the century

i was checking in some children's paper books earlier today at work and it made me wonder who would win in a no holds bar match between the babysitters club and the boxcar children.

(i took some time and put together this mock up. yeah i'm pretty into this hypothetical match)

so in the left corner we have the babysitters club, four money driven, business savvy tweens.
on the right corner we have 4 orphaned kids who lived in a boxcar. their ages range from 14-6, the the average equaling 10.5.

one of the girl's name is violet. now if that isn't a hobo name, i don't know what is. it's like john smith, or to a lesser extent, john johnson. that shows she can roll with the punches, and she has probably been taken a bunch of shit from other kids therefore building a tough outer emotional skin. the chewing gum girl from "charlie and chocolate factory," was also named violet. she was one tough customer, and if the boxcar child is anything like that blueberry violet, she one to look out for in the match.

4 goal driven women, that's a lot of estrogen there. i wouldn't want to get in the way of them a pint of ben and jerry's chunky monkey. there is a possibility of a "women of the amazon" tribal/primal instinct exuding from them.

they mainly only deal with social problems and conflicts with one another and other characters. although they don't do much mystery solving, they are able to problem solve and work together as a cohesive unit.

the club started out with 4 members but grew into 10. although the match is 4 vs 4, there is a possibility of a WWE illegal tag-team, where the friends rooting ring side jump in and knocks a boxcar child out with a folded metal chair while the ref's back is turned by a diversion from a babysitter girl.

the boxcar children were orphans who lived in a boxcar until their long lost stinky wealthy grandfather discovered them and took them in. even though they live in a large house they still go back to the boxcar. what can i say, you can take the kids out of the boxcar, but you can't take the boxcar out of the kids.

their grandfather is wealthy so i'm sure they would have state of the art equipment and leading experts training them around the clock, not sparing a dime to maximize their abilities, while the babysitters club girls have to wait until friday night to get paid for babysitting in order to afford that 10 pound dumbbell.

the the name "boxcar children" alludes they're tough, hobo-trained scrappy fighters. their downfall is the youngest one, benny. maybe he can bite someone to death. they're brothers and sisters and tied together by blood and they'll most likely right anyone to the death if you mess with one of them.

while probably not book smart due to all that boxcar living, they're definitely street smart - easily able to solve any mystery and foil the plot of an antagonist. i.e. evil landlords, has been sailors who are homeless in an abandoned shipyard, misunderstood cat ladies. they're much like scooby doo and the gang... minus the sexual tension between a dog and that scratchy voiced guy, doobie smoking, and bell-bottom pants.

with all that said, i would give 3-1 odds on the boxcar children.

yes, i just devoted an entire blog on the subject.